How are you? I am doing well this year. Is your sleigh ready for the big day? Do the reindeer have any injuries right now? Hope that Comet got over that nasty case of turf toe that caused him to miss all those practice runs. Ok, enough formalities here fat man. Let's start talking turkey here and get things worked out for Christmas this year. I know this letter is arriving with just a day to prepare but I know you can handle it.
First off I want to let you know that we've been extra good here at Cowboy Altitude and therefore deserve some proper compensation. We don't need anything personally but we're looking for you to hook up the Wyoming Cowboys here in 2011. The Cowboys have been well behaved this year and should be at the top of your "NICE" list. If you see the list with BYU on top then you're looking at the wrong one.
Here are some great examples of what great things Wyoming accomplished this year. No scandals rocked the athletic department. No parents of players were demanding hundreds of thousands of dollars compensation for their son playing football. We just don't play those types of games here. Our athletes hit the books and got good grades. Part of that education deal that happens at Universities. We didn't plot the downfall of our conference that we helped create.
Seems like a pretty convincing argument to me. We'll even leave out some whole milk and macadamia nut cookies for you. So now that you've read of list of accomplishments how about you consider our list of demands/requests.
- A winning record in conference play for the Cowboy basketball team in 2011 would great. Not sure how you'll make this happen but if we some how end up playing Air Force twelve times at home that would be a start. We'd be willing to settle for not having to play in the pigtail game of the MWC tournament.
- Another bowl game in 2011. We took a one year hiatus but we need to play in the post season again. We're not asking for the Fiesta Bowl or anything outragous here. Anywhere from the Vegas Bowl to the New Mexico Bowl would be suitable.
- A gift of 25lbs for each member of the Wyoming defensive line. We need some beef on the d-line and you sure know how to pack on the pounds yourself. Our defensive tackles should not weigh the same as our defensive ends. Share some of those beefcake secrets you have Santa and we'd be very appreciative.
- An NCAA tournament bid for the Wyoming Cowgirls. This a talented squad and they deserve more than just the NIT this year. Coach Legerski does a great job and has built the program for plenty of success.
- An automatic bid for the Mountain West Conference to a BCS game. We know this one may take a while to work on but we know you can do it. This wouldn't just help us but the entire conference as well. Go talk to Bill Hancock and get this worked out.
- A wall of protection for Austyn Carta-Samuels aka an offensive line. Get the kid some protection out on the field and he should be able to make a lot more plays. If they can also block for Alvester Alexander we would appreciate that as well.
- Four quality recruits to finish the 2011 Wyoming football class. Don't want to big picky but how about a couple four star recruits? Fine, we'll settle for some three stars if we must. A big time WR, a couple big hog mollys and a beastly defensive linemen. No partridges in a pear needed at this time - we're already well equipped with plenty of birds and fruits trees.
- An official Red Ryder, carbine action, two-hundred shot range model air rifle with a compass in the stock.
- More personality from Coach Christensen. He doesn't need to be so secretive with the fans and media. There is no problem with being serious about your job but crack a few jokes at press conferences every now and then. It would also be badass if he wore colorful poncho during games.
- For the Mountain West to have a regular bowl that is actually played on New Years Day. All the Mountain West teams finish their seasons with weekday bowl games except for TCU. Let's get these games moved back a few days in the calender.
- More markets added for the Mtn. Things have been progressing lately with Chicago, Boston and Atlanta added to name a few but I want more. Take care of the West Coast with Seattle, Portland and San Francisco. Add in New York if you really want to as well.
- A third victory in the Border War in a row. Make the Bronze Boot a permanent fixture in Laramie. Also let the basketball team beat the Rams as well.
Thanks for reading all this Santa and I'm sure you'll have no problem delivering everything on this wishlist. We know you'll take care of everyone on the nice list. Feel free to pick up some Wyoming coal to deliver in Provo while you're at it.
Anything else you'd wish for? Add it in the comments and we'll see if Santa delivers.